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Jewish Jokes

Our Favorite Jewish Jokes

Everyone loves a great Jewish joke! From rabbis to parrots, from Vilna to Brooklyn, from cobblers to yentas, these are the world’s best Jewish jokes. Enjoy!
 

All jokes adapted by Sal Litvak, the Accidental Talmudist.

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Latest Jokes

  • Last Meal And Testament 🤣

    Three men, a Frenchman, an Italian, and a Jew, were condemned to be executed. Their captors said they had the right to one final meal before dying.

    They asked the Frenchman what he wanted.

    “Good French wine and and a baguette,” he requested. So they gave it to him, he ate, and then they executed him.

    Next was the Italian’s turn. “Give me a big plate of pasta,” he said. They brought it, he ate, and they executed him.

    Then came the Jew. “Please bring me a big bowl of strawberries,” he said.

    “Strawberries!!! They aren’t even in season!”

    “So, I’ll wait…”

    🤣

  • Are You Jewish? 🤣

    A woman on the F train turns to the man next to her.

    “Excuse me,” she says, “but are you Jewish?”

    “No,” replies the man.

    A few minutes later the woman turns again.

    “I’m sorry, but are you sure you’re not Jewish?”

    “I’m sure.”

    A few more minutes go by.

    “Are you absolutely sure you’re not Jewish?”

    “OK, fine. You win. Yes, I’m Jewish.”

    “It’s funny,” she says.” You don’t look Jewish.”

    😂

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