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Napoleon’s Jewish Commander

After winning a battle that vastly expanded his empire, Napoleon summoned his commanders to a celebration. Each was offered a reward...

After winning a battle that vastly expanded his empire, Napoleon summoned his commanders to a celebration.

“Gentlemen, today I reward your courage! Ask and it shall be granted!”

The Bavarian commander said, “Autonomy for Bavaria!”

“So it shall be!”

The Slovakian commander said, “Liberty for Slovakia!”

“So it shall be!”

And so it went for the Arabian and the Ukrainian generals.

Finally, the commander of the Jewish legion stepped forward.

“And what for you, my loyal friend?”

“I would like a cup of hot coffee with milk and no sugar, two bagels with cream cheese, and some lox on the side.”

“Bring my friend his breakfast immediately!”

As the Jewish commander sat down to eat, the other commanders gaped in amazement.

“You fool!” said the Bavarian commander. “Why make such a stupid request? You could have asked for a nation, or riches and power! Why waste your wish on bagels?”

“At least I got what I asked for.”

Adapted from Two Bagels on Philip Chircop’s blog.

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