Max’s Cardiologist

No More Stress

Max Goldberg goes to see his cardiologist. The doctor examines him and then tells Max he’d like to speak to Mrs. Goldberg privately. So Max leaves the room and his wife comes in. The doctor tells her, “Mrs. Goldberg, your husband’s condition is extremely serious. It is exacerbated by stress so you must do everything you can to eliminate stress from Max’s life. When he gets up every morning, make his favorite breakfast and bring it to him in bed. Give him a hug and a kiss on his way out the door, and call him at work to tell him how great he is. When he comes home in the evening, have his slippers and a delicious dinner waiting for him. Give him whatever he wants in the bedroom, and act sweet to him at all times. If you do this, Max can live another twenty years.” 

Mrs. Goldberg nods along, then leaves the office and gets in the car, where Max worriedly asks her what the doctor said. Mrs. Goldberg responds, “You’re going to die.”


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