While walking in Brooklyn, Yitzy was approached by a shabby derelict.
“Mister, can you spare two dollars so I can buy dinner?”
Yitzy took out two dollars and asked, “If I give you this, will you use it to buy whisky?”
“No, I stopped drinking years ago.”
“Will you use it to gamble?”
“I don’t gamble. I’m just trying to stay alive.”
“Will you spend it on golf?”
“I haven’t played golf in 20 years!”
“Will you spend it on cigarettes?”
“I quit years ago when the price shot up.”
Yitzy thought for a moment, and said, “Well, I’m not going to give you two dollars. I’m gonna take you home for a terrific dinner, cooked by my wife.”
“Really? That’d be awesome, but won’t your wife be angry? I know I’m dirty, and I smell pretty bad.”
“Brother, that’s OK. I just want my wife to see what a man looks like who’s given up drinking, gambling, smoking and golf.”
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