How does sexual immorality damage community?
Table for Five: Ki Teitzei
In partnership with the Jewish Journal of Los Angeles
Edited by Nina Litvak & Salvador Litvak, the Accidental Talmudist
If a man is found lying with another man’s wife, both of them—the man and the woman with whom he lay—shall die. Thus you will sweep away evil from Israel. -Deut. 22:22
Gilla Nissan
Teacher, Author, Poet and Essayist
The Torah’s approach to forbidden relationships reflects both realism and vision. Human sexuality is among the strongest drives of existence. It holds the power to create life, but also to unravel families, communities, and the moral fabric of society. The sages taught: “אין אפוטרופוס לעריות”—there is no guardian against sexual temptation. No individual, however righteous or wise, can fully trust themselves in this domain.
From this principle, halakhic tradition established protective fences. The laws of yichud prohibit seclusion between a man and a woman who are not married to each other. Other safeguards cultivate modesty and prevent intimacy from crossing dangerous boundaries. These measures are not about suspicion of individuals; they are a sober recognition of human nature. Desire is powerful, and humility requires admitting our own vulnerability.
Kabbalah deepens the picture. It views sexuality not only as a biological impulse but as a manifestation of divine energy. Forbidden unions (arayot) symbolize unrestrained life-force. Like the primordial light of creation, sexual energy must be channeled through boundaries. Just as God contracted infinite light through tzimtzum to make space for the world, so too must humans shape their passions within sacred limits. Without this framework, the same fire that gives life can overwhelm and destroy.
Thus, halakha guards through external boundaries while Kabbalah reveals the inner logic of those fences. Together they affirm one truth: human love and desire are divine in essence, but only when disciplined and sanctified do they illuminate rather than consume.
Gavriel Aryeh Sanders
Spokesman, Be A Mensch Foundation
To modern ears, the Torah’s treatment of adultery may seem extreme. Yet within its legal and moral framework, marital fidelity is not merely a personal matter; it is a public trust. Infidelity tears at the bonds that hold families together, and when families weaken, the entire social fabric frays.
The prescribed penalty for adultery was severe, but the conditions for conviction made it virtually impossible to apply. Two valid eyewitnesses, advance warning, and immediate acknowledgement were required. As the Sages taught, a court that executed even once in seventy years was deemed “bloodthirsty.” The real aim was deterrence, underscoring that certain breaches strike so deeply at the heart of communal life that they cannot be normalized.
Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks observed that the Torah’s concern here parallels the Sotah ritual in Parshat Naso. Even the mere suspicion of infidelity warranted a public process — not to humiliate, but to restore peace between husband and wife, because without peace in the home, there is no peace in the community. He further noted that in Parshat Balak, adultery paired with idolatry precipitated national disaster, showing how betrayal in intimate life can cascade into societal collapse.
The phrase “sweep away evil from Israel” reminds us that every generation must guard the sanctity of trust — in marriage, in community, and in covenant. Today, our role is to confront betrayal with honesty, repair trust when possible, and preserve faithfulness as a foundation for blessing.
Rabbi Adam Kligfeld
Senior Rabbi, Temple Beth Am
Many Jews bristle at capital punishment in general, let alone for ethical but non-violent transgressions. Our ancestors did as well, as rabbinic literature essentially interprets this verse out of practical application. It is likely that not a single Jew in history was executed by a religious court for the sin of adultery. Yet the traditional, curious Jew is hungry to extract meaning from every verse, even those whose plain meaning presents a challenge.
My favorite interpretation of this verse comes from the Or HaChaim, an 18th C. Moroccan sage. He invokes the Talmud’s allegorical treatment, saying that the “adultery” referred to is between the anthropomorphized Torah and a gentile, from which we can extrapolate to any person who does not read the text assuming its richness and sanctity. One more cynically skeptical than sacredly curious. The impact of that “union” is the “death” of both. The incurious, doubting reader will spiritually decline, for s/he is actively choosing not to plumb divine writ for meaning and inspiration. And certainly if the Torah were only “consorting” with such readers, the Torah itself would be desiccated, stripped of its generational sweetness and impact. The Torah would die.
Our love affair with the Torah requires a certain bidirectional monogamy. Of course Jews throughout the generations have found illumination from external, secular sources as well. But the Torah is our wellspring, and we remain devoted to it. Absent that union, there is great loss. A certain type of death. Because of that union, there is transcendence. And life itself.
Rabbi Nicholas Losorelli
Jeffery & Allyn Levine Assistant Dean, Ziegler School of Rabbinic Studies
The wording of our pasuk is euphemistically polite, utilizing the passive verb form, nifal, saying: “im yimatze”, which could be translated as “if one is found”. Does that mean it takes being caught to found guilty? If so, if you never get caught, then you’re never guilty. Clearly this isn’t the message the Torah wants to convey because God will rout out truth one way or another, regardless of any human agent. However, it bears asking because we very well could reach this fraught conclusion. As Jonathan Haidt describes in his book “The Righteous Mind: Why Good People are Divided by Politics and Religion”, our own inner Press Secretary could start doing their work, and rationalizing us into being righteous, even though we are so clearly not.
And now that we’re in the month of Elul, our month of introspective preparation for the High Holidays, we are no doubt going to run into our inner Press Secretary working away, collaborating with them to write us in as the heroes of our own stories. However, examining our triumphs and shortcomings is not a time for heroes. It’s not a time for press releases—or public generic social media posts. It is a time for taking a good honest look at all those things that we thought we got away with, and bringing them out into the light, because inevitably those things will be brought into the light, because it isn’t a matter of “if one is found”, but rather “when”.
Kylie Ora Lobell
President, KOL Digital Marketing
Many of the commandments we find in the Torah not only hurt the sinner – they hurt those around them and can lead to depravity among the entire society. When someone speaks lashon hara (gossips), it hurts the person saying it, the person hearing it, and the person who is being talked about. If you steal, it hurts not only your Neshama (soul) and makes you a more callous person, but also it obviously hurts the person you are stealing from… and on and on it goes. Adultery is no different – it is harmful to the people engaging it and their loved ones and contributes to a breakdown of society. Marriage is sacred and holy. During the Sotah ritual, a woman who is accused of adultery must drink an elixir containing God’s name which has been erased. This means that peace between a husband and wife is so important to God that He is willing to erase His name to achieve it. The commandment not to commit adultery, like the other commandments found in this Torah portion, are all about that fundamental Golden Rule: love your neighbor as yourself. Do not take your neighbor’s husband or wife. Do not hurt your neighbor or your loved ones or your society. Think about how you would want to be treated. What is truly evil is to hurt each other, with adultery, with gossip, with stealing and otherwise harming one another. As an individual, and as a society, we must recognize and respect this – and act accordingly.
With thanks to Gilla Nissan, Gavriel Aryeh Sanders, Rabbi Adam Kligfeld, Rabbi Nicholas Losorelli and Kylie Ora Lobell.
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